'I was horrified': Four parents on the moment they realised their child was being bullied

According to Bullying No Way, approximately one in four Year 4 to Year 9 students in Australia reported being bullied every few weeks or more often.

We talked to four anonymous parents who became aware their children were on the receiving end of vicious bullying at school.

'He was always on edge with the computer'

Parent 1 discovered their son was being bullied when they witnessed it while picking him up from school.

"I was waiting in the 'kiss and drop' to collect my sons from school and my 'special one' was happily walking towards my car," they tell 9honey.

"I noticed that about four boys walking behind him and copying his every step and every move and laughing at him."

In hindsight, the problem had started earlier when her son began hiding his computer in a cupboard at home.

"I just thought he was storing it away from his brothers. He then didn't want to take it to school, and he could never tell me why he didn't," the parent explains.

"I just saw that he was always on edge with the computer and I limited his time on it but he had to do homework. This went on for a while."

One night they checked his computer and were horrified by what they saw.

"Then the bombardment started just sending text after text saying his name, calling him names, telling him he was stupid, laughing ... one even wrote he is so stupid he doesn't know how to silence the messages.

"It was hundreds. I was horrified and angry."

After years of this, they changed schools. Attempts to address the issue at school were unsuccessful.

"The main bully was the son of one of the teachers, so my advising them pretty much fell on deaf ears," they said.

'He never allowed anyone else to play with my child'

Parent 2 only became aware their son had been bullied when the bully left school and their son "started to have lots of friends."

"Other parents came up to me and said that their children were so happy they got to play with my child finally," the parent shared.

"When I questioned why they were saying these things, they informed me that my child wasn't allowed to play with their child because the other boy never allowed anyone else to play with my child."

Then, the parent found out the full extent of their son's experience.

"He would say things that would make my child feel stupid and not good enough to be others' friends."

When the parent asked their son about the bullying, he said he "didn't want to upset this boy as he was his friend."

"He did share some of the things the boy used to say to him that made him sad."

'The teachers needed help to see this was bullying'

Parent 3 changed their son's school twice before pulling him out for good and homeschooling him.

Their son's experience was so damaging, he has been left with complex post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).

"The consequences of bullying have eroded their self-worth to such a degree, that forming healthy friendships wherever they move, is proving to be most difficult," they shared.

This parent didn't discover the extent of their son's experience until it was "revealed during a counselling session."

The bullying had taken the form of "psychological abuse in person, which then continued at night on social media" and included "name-calling, teasing" and "social exclusion."

The parents struggled to make teachers at the school understand their son was being bullied.

"The teachers needed help to see this was bullying, but then the counsellors ran groups to support and mediate the behaviours occurring and encouraged healthy behaviours and relationships," they said.

They would like to see "more education and controls need to be provided around online bullying especially", adding, "Bullying is now a 24-hour problem and doesn't stop once the child goes home."

'She was depressed and suicidal'

Parent 4 also changed their child's school in an attempt to escape bullying.

"It made a huge difference as our daughter was depressed and suicidal, but now is totally the opposite," they share.

The parent was told about the bullying by their daughter, and he and his wife also witnessed it.

"Name-calling, excluding her from group activities, turning new kids away from her, having no one turn up to her birthday party despite saying they would come, spreading rumours, eventually physical teasing like pouring drinks over her," he said, recalling examples.

When their daughter told them about the bullying, they advised her to "ignore them, tell the teacher."

This wasn't helpful. Teachers "ignored it and did not punish or talk to the kids.· What would you like to see done about bullying?"

Maria Sarina, Coordinator of Counselling at Australian Christian College Marsden Park, has compiled a comprehensive list of strategies for parents to identify and tackle bullying effectively.

For resources on supporting children who are being bullied, visit the Bullying No Way website or contact Kid's Helpline on 1800 55 1800.