Why women who cheat are judged more harshly than men

We're constantly told women cheat just as often as men, we're just better at hiding it.

Jokes aside, it seems despite the prevalence of extra-marital affairs by both genders, women are judged much more harshly than men.

Certified sexologist and licensed relationship therapist Dr Tammy Nelson says this is because of lingering assumptions about cheating.

"We have always assumed cheating is a man's game," she tells 9Honey. "We don't like to think of women as cheaters. We want to trust women, to think of them as mothers, the women who care for us, who take care of us, who nurture."

Dr Nelson says due to these beliefs, we don't want to think that women can lie, which is what it takes to cheat.

"It's also uncomfortable to think that they are actually sexual beings," she adds.

Ashley Madison has found 92 percent of women believe they face more frequent criticism than men for cheating.

"Men and women both cheat for the same reason," Dr Nelson says. "They cheat for emotional connection, they cheat for attention, they cheat for sex, they cheat because it's illicit, it's forbidden and it feels good."

She agrees women are more likely to keep their affairs a secret, but says that's due to the harsher judgement they face.

When it comes to who women will most likely cheat with, Dr Nelson says it can be anyone with whom they feel they can experiment sexually.

A study by Ashley Madison showed female cheaters prefer to cheat with someone they know rather than a stranger.

Tammy Nelson Ph.D. is a Certified Sexologist and Licensed Relationship therapist and the author of "When You're the One Who Cheats."  She can be found at www.drtammynelson.com.