Guest 'floored' by unexpected cost at wedding event: 'If I had known, I wouldn't have gone'

A wedding guest who attended a rehearsal dinner was "floored" when they were made to pay for their meal and drinks.

The guest had assumed the event would be paid for by the groom's family, as per tradition.

Writing on Reddit's 'Wedding Shaming' thread they said the rehearsal dinner, held a couple of years ago, was planned by the groom's parents at an "expensive, fancy" restaurant.

READ MORE: 'My winter bill was astronomical. I saved hundreds with one call'

"We were told by the bride that we had to attend, but it's not a restaurant I would have chosen for myself ever because $$$," they wrote.

"But I figured, hey - a nice meal to thank me for the hours I spent traveling to the wedding, helping run around for tasks, steaming all the dresses, buying my own dress, etc."

When they arrived, they say they were "encouraged by the groom's father to drink up and so we order drinks (which I otherwise wouldn't have gotten)".

READ MORE: These are my top five picks - and honourable mentions - from the new Kmart living range

"There's like 20 people at this dinner, and the cheapest dish on the menu starts at like $30-35," they added.

At the end of the dinner, the groom's father stood up to give his toast, thanking everyone for attending, "and then informs us that the waiter will be around shortly with each of our bills so we can all settle up individually".

"I was floored. My bill alone (which I had tried to keep as cheap as possible, thankfully, because I had felt bad that the father was about to spend thousands on the dinner considering 20+ people were there) was over $100 after tax and tip," the guest said.

They said they were "so upset afterwards".

"If I had known I would have to pay for the dinner myself, I wouldn't have gone. As much as I love the bride, I had already spent hundreds of dollars to attend her wedding and be a part of it.

"Why am I paying more at a dinner that was meant to be thanking us for our contributions?!"

Redditors following this thread had never heard of guests being made to pay for a rehearsal dinner before.

"My son is getting married in October, and I'm in the process of planning the rehearsal dinner. I wouldn't DREAM of asking anybody else to pitch in a single penny!" one mother-of-the-groom said.

Another labelled the father's move "a huge level of tackiness" and said they wouldn't have purchased a gift for the bride and groom as a result.

"It's well understood that the groom's parents are footing that bill unless expressed otherwise," another agreed.

"I would say that it's well understood that the wedding party is not footing the bill. Who is paying for it varies because many cultures and families have their own traditions," another said.

View gallery

The biggest celebrity moments at the Bezos-Sanchez wedding

Darcy Allen, General Manager of Easy Weddings, says rehearsal dinners aren't "common across Australian weddings" and are more often seen at a "regional or destination wedding, where guests have travelled far and wide to be at the location, there will be some kind of pre-wedding dinner or get together the night prior".

"In my experience on both occasions where I have attended one, food and drinks were at own cost; however, the couple and family members were shouting drinks here and there, but the main cost was worn by the guests," Allen said.

The average cost of a rehearsal dinner for attendees tends to be "typically $100-$150 per person for a few drinks and usually a two-course meal".

READ MORE: Pack this in your carry-on in case your checked luggage goes missing

In Australia, most commonly couples will "separate the night prior and have a relaxed evening with their bridal party separately, normally in this instance it's a hot roast chicken and some quick and easy salads spread on the kitchen table".

For wedding guests faced with unreasonable money requests ahead of nuptials, Allen says it's "completely fair to bow out of pre and post wedding events if you aren't able to afford to be there, especially if they are on a weekday prior to, say a Friday wedding and it requires you to take time off from work".

FOLLOW US ON WHATSAPP HERE: Stay across all the latest in celebrity, lifestyle and opinion via our WhatsApp channel. No comments, no algorithm and nobody can see your private details.