Why Christmas is the time of year to have some difficult conversations with your parents

The festive season is such a busy period for everyone, but Bianca Dye wants people to use this time to have some tough conversations with their parents. 

She knows first-hand how hard it can be to talk to your older parents about their health and if they need help around the house, which is why she wants people to do it. 

"This is a time of year where I think we get so busy that we forget that the older people around us, they actually need us more," Dye told 9Honey. 

"But [they] probably feel bad and feel like they're a bit of a burden and a bit guilty and don't necessarily want to reach out." 

For some families, getting together at Christmas might be the first time you've seen your older parents in a while. It might have been weeks, or even months, which is why it is important to raise any concerns or have these hard conversations when you see them. 

Dye, who is an ambassador for Aged Care Decisions, has had some tough chats with her 79-year-old mum Annie, which is why she wants others to know what to look out for. 

"I have to say, it was not easy," Dye said of the chats with her mum, but it has really helped them both.

If you're not sure where to start, or even what to look out for, there are some things you can look out for that can help families start to make a plan about getting help if that's what is needed.

Here are some of the key things experts from Aged Care Decisions want people to be aware of.

Are they getting forgetful?

Do they have trouble following conversations or remembering details?

How is their mobility?

Watch how they move around. Are they steady on their feet, or do they seem fearful of falling? Look for signs of muscle weakness, unsteadiness, difficulty getting in and out of a chair, or difficulty climbing stairs.

Are they eating properly?

If you notice they have lost weight, often say they aren't hungry, or they seem to avoid eating altogether, it might be a good idea to help them prepare meals or arrange for a regular meal delivery service.

Are they keeping up with the housework?

Check whether the house is untidy, or if there's a buildup of dishes or laundry. Are they completing essential tasks such as paying bills? Are the bins going out each week?

Is their home safe and comfortable?

Are there trip hazards like rugs, electrical cords, or steps? Make sure their home is well lit, and the temperature is comfortable year-round.

How is their personal hygiene?

Notice whether they are keeping up with bathing, brushing teeth, and grooming. Difficulty with these tasks can signal mobility issues, cognitive decline, or depression.

Can they get out and about?

Many elderly people stop driving due to safety concerns. Lack of transportation can lead to isolation, feelings of helplessness and missed medical care.

Do they seem emotionally stable?

Look for signs of depression or anxiety, such as mood swings, withdrawal, irritability, or lack of interest in activities they once enjoyed.

Have their health needs changed significantly?

Have they been in hospital recently? Do they have complex medical needs? If they are struggling to manage conditions such as diabetes or high blood pressure, or if they have mobility issues, they made need regular assistance from a home care provider or health professional.

Are they socially connected?

Enquire about their social life. Do they have friends, family, or neighbours they spend time with regularly? Do they participate in community or group activities?

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