Money Manners: 'Is it reasonable to ask for petrol money from friends I keep giving lifts to?'

Money Manners is Honey Money's weekly column that deals with money etiquette matters that can be the cause of many an awkward encounter.

Submit your Money Manners questions to Jo Abi at jabi@nine.com.au

This week's question comes from a 9honey reader who is facing an awkward situation with friends.

Dilemma: 'Is it reasonable to ask for fuel money from friends you keep giving lifts to?'

I am one of the only drivers in my group of friends, and I keep giving them lifts but am starting to resent it.

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They seem to expect me to drive us all around all the time and they don't all live close to me. Sometimes picking them up and dropping them home takes me an extra 40 minutes on top of the time I am already out.

I'm not a drinker so I don't care about that, but I am saving them hundreds of dollars in Ubers and taxis and not once have they offered to contribute to petrol or tolls or parking.

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I'm sure it was fun to pick your friends up and drop them off in the beginning. It probably added to the excitement of the night out.

But friends who take advantage quickly become irritating, and the fact not one of them has offered to contribute to the cost of driving them around all the time is a little rude.

You have two options, and which one you exercise really depends on the strength of these friendships.

Option 1: Casually suggest they contribute by saying something like, "Hey guys, I love driving you around but could you contribute to petrol and tolls and parking every now and then?"

If they are good friends they'll immediately apologise and agree, because it sounds like this is a regular thing and they should have done this themselves by now.

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If they don't react well, then you don't have to pick them up anymore!

Option 2: Tell them you can't pick them up anymore because you can't keep up with the cost of doing so.

Then you can all start sharing the cost of Ubers and taxis, which will save you money and cost them! And they'll realise you have been wearing the cost yourself this whole time.

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Maybe one will suggest you driving them and them paying you as that would be more convenient. Or, you enjoy your new life of saving on the cost of being the designated driver in Ubers and taxis and public transport.

Once the expectation that you will pick them up and drop them off fades, you can drive yourself from time to time and this shouldn't cause any issues.

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