'Why I invited my friends on our honeymoon'

Anyone who’s been on a honeymoon will tell you it’s a wonderful, necessary get away; but having just been on a ‘buddymoon’ I can tell you – they’re better.

For the uninitiated a ‘buddymoon’ is basically a honeymoon with friends. You pick an equally romantic destination, but instead of booking one room with a view, you book 2, or 3 or even 4.

Many would remember the TV ad where a couple arrives on holiday only for the guy to open a door in their room to reveal his mate in the room next room, and another by the pool – this isn’t like that.

A buddymoon isn’t an ambush holiday by the boys, it’s a group trip from the start.

I can understand why some may think bringing others would dilute the significance and romance of a post-wedding getaway, but that’s not the case at all. What I’ve found is that it highlights the union even further…

In the same way a wedding reception is not simply a big group dinner, a buddymoon is not a big group holiday – it’s a celebration of the fact a couple (you) just got married and that loving-undercurrent runs through every activity on the trip.

You still lounge by the pool, drink everything in sight, read a book, have a nap or go for a walk – all the things you do on a regulation honeymoon…

But your ability to do a wider raft of actives opens up because you have more people willing to do more (or less) things.

There is no way my wife would have wanted to play golf on our honeymoon, in the same way I didn’t want to stroll through the local markets, but on our buddymoon we did both those things, without feeling we’d abandoned the other – and then come back together later in the day to compare stories and crack another bottle of champers.

And all this happens while you’re buzzing on the adrenaline from your wedding day, which is still very much the focus of your friends’ attention as well. (And why wouldn’t you want that group buzz to continue this as long as possible?)

My experience with a traditional honeymoon is that while they’re delightful on paper, they’re actually not as much fun as they could be. I spent our week watching couples on regulation 2-person honeymoons and while I am sure they were enjoying it, they didn’t really look it.

On the first day you’d see them chatting and bubbling along at dinner – drink in hand – loving every second.

But by the third day, while there was still the champagne, and a bit of conversation, there was also a fair bit of phone time.

And then by day 5 the same couples would be sitting there, pretty much locked into their phone over the meal and conversation had largely run dry.

That’s not because they aren’t enjoying being there with each other – but because there is only so much you can really talk about over a full week when you’re in the same place doing the same thing.

Now if you’re in a remote destination (as honeymoons often are) you may meet another couple and spark a friendship that allows you to come together over lunches and dinners, but the chance of that is pretty low…And who really likes meeting new people?!

Enter the ‘buddymoon’.

Every meal is an event; there is always a cocktail within reach, and the conversation across the group bounces along all week and the laughter never stops.

And the answer to the main question of ‘Don’t you lose the romance because you’re never alone?’ is simple, make sure you all have your own rooms.

If anything, a ‘buddymoon’ makes the one-on-one times you get even more enjoyable because you can relish in the fact you’re together in some cool place, with your favourite people, after you’ve just done the best thing you’ve ever done – and honestly it doesn’t get better.