'My favourite beauty product was discontinued and I'm not OK'

OPINION -- This year I suffered a major life crisis.

No one died, or got sick. No relationship ended. No one moved out. A pet didn't die. Yet I was bereft.

You see, one of my favourite beauty products, a brand of foundation, disappeared from shelves. Discontinued. Defunct. And I was distraught.

I had been down this road before. But this one hurt, because I had used this brand for years.

It was nothing fancy. A chainstore brand found in some discount stores, pharmacies and supermarkets, but I loved it.

It cost about $30 a bottle, sometimes even cheaper on sale, but it did the job well, I like to think.

It had something I struggle to pronounce, hyaluronic acid, and collagen, and since I had been talked into changing shades to something slightly darker than my natural pale skin colour, it left me with a healthy glow.

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So much so in fact that when I didn't have it on, my family was convinced I was unwell.

When it started to disappear from shelves a couple of years ago, I panicked. I started buying up any I could find.

When they stopped being stocked in stores I looked online, and found a stockist on Amazon. So I ordered 10.

When they turned up in the mail wrapped in bubble wrap I was like a junkie who had scored a hit.

I hid them away in the cupboard and would only bring out a new one when I was certain I had squeezed every last drop from the last.

As my supply dwindled, I started searching online again, but it was too late.

I rued the day I didn't buy all 20 online when I could.

If there had been a make-up black market version I would have found it.

I took to the streets to search for more.

I would ask random shop assistants if they had seen it.

"No," I heard more than once. "It has been discontinued. I don't know why because it was popular. So many people have been asking for it."

As my remaining bottle inched closer to empty, I finally admitted defeat and started looking for an alternative.

I started online, searching up the ingredients I craved.

Then I started carrying my little bottle everywhere. Sales assistants would waste precious drops putting it on their hands to colour match it.

Nothing worked. There was nothing like it. My life was OVER.

There were false starts and false promises.

A sales assistant promised a perfect match but once I got home and tried it, I realised she had lied to me.

I had fallen for her words like a love sick school girl. The realisation I had been duped stung.

I wore that mismatched colour like a walk of shame across my face while I continued to look for an alternative.

My months'-long search finally led me to the spiritual home of young girls and women across Australia – Sephora.

There I found the closest match yet – but at almost triple the price, I am on the hunt for a more affordable alternative.

And I am not alone.

Gavin Northey, an associate Professor at the Department of Marketing at Griffith University, told nine.com.au last year that feeling bereft over the loss of a familiar beauty product was not only common but "totally normal".

He said it was caused by a number of psychological mechanisms, including loss aversion, which led to the aforementioned stockpiling, followed by feelings of loss and even trauma once the supply runs out.

So for now, I keep searching, secure in the knowledge that one day I will find the perfect foundation, only for an employee at a cosmetics company to make it obsolete and hurtle me back to square one.

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