Married At First Sight recap, Episode 28: Reunion dinner party brings the drama
Drama is served!
Married At First Sight's reunion special picks up two-and-a-half months after the experiment ended. Literally everyone we've met throughout the season is back for this night of mayhem (part one of the two-part finale).
Basically, it's a MAFS dinner party on steroids. Lauren! Michael! Entrepreneur Jonathan! Scarlett! Debbie! Everybody is here!
But from the immense well of the 20 participants' potential conflicts spring two central fountains of drama.
RELATED: Read 9Honey's full recap of Married At First Sight's Episode 27
Drama No. 1: The Lauren-Jonesy-Cheryl-Jonathan-Scarlett pentagon clusterf--k
The most fun thing about this reunion is remembering how we all used to think Entrepreneur Jonathan was such a villain and terrible guy. But now, next to Jonesy and Anthony and possibly even Naughty Nick, he is a good scout.
And also kind of endearing? And oh NO, am I falling for Entrepreneur Jonathan??
OK, not quite. But he is the best of the worst.
Sure, he's still being petty about Cheryl and her refusal to say hi to him at the party, BUT he doesn't really engage with Jonesy's boob-shaming (Jonesy calls Cheryl "whoppers", but not to her face, of course). So, that's a plus if we're setting a low bar for decency here.
Anyway, Jonathan arrives to the party early and has a chat with John who is as jovial and charming as ever.
Jonathan reveals that he's been seeing a new girl and is very happy in life. This pleases John, who promptly informs a just-arrived Scarlett that Jonathan is off-the-market.
"Oh, Jonathan's all loved up?" she says glumly, watching her reunion hook-up dreams fly out the window.
Soon Jonesy joins the group. This is good news for Jonathan, who finds a fast friend to bond with over the shared trauma of dating Cheryl. And good news for Scarlett, who has a new potential hookup partner.
"I wouldn't have left you," Scarlett purrs as Jonesy holds her hand. There is so much flirting. So much banter. So much talk of "third time's a charm".
But then Cheryl and Lauren arrive (separately), and Jonesy spends most of his time freaking out over avoiding them both to no avail.
Michael is also at this dinner party, but leaves as soon as the food arrives because he's tired and doesn't drink anyway so, in the words of Sharon, "What is even the point?"
This is fine with Scarlett because she's barely said two words to him (apart from a brief cornering where she told him she's been working on her fitness and is angling to move to his hometown of Perth).
Scarlett has bigger fish to fry. She is soon whisked away to have a dramatic confrontation with Cheryl on the couch.
"Ok, Cheryl's on the war path," says Mel Schilling from the experts' spy room.
You see, Cheryl never really got over that whole Jonathan texting Scarlett thing from way early in the season.
It's been so long since she's thought of her ill-fated marriage that she has forgotten his name and calls him "Jordan".
This causes Scarlett to storm off and call Cheryl "the fakest girl I've ever met."
"Bye, Felicia!" says Cheryl cheerfully, reminding us that she is 25 and in tune with the youths.
"The only thing that's fake about me is my boobs and maybe some of my lips," she tells us. "I'm real."
Meanwhile, Lauren has finally cornered Jonesy to offer him some 'constructive criticism'.
"You know what, you're a cocky little prick," she says. "You're arrogant, you're full of yourself, you need to pull it back down a few cogs. Don't be a wanker."
Drama No. 2: The Nadia and Anthony behind-the-scenes bombshell
This drama begins from the moment Nadia enters the party…alone.
"Where the f---'s Anthony?" says Nick, outraged at the absence of his bro.
Nadia quickly gathers her girls to inform them that "as soon as the cameras stopped rolling, he dropped me like a hot cake."
In fact, says Nadia, Anthony only waited one day after filming wrapped to say, "My feelings haven't grown for you. I can't do this."
Everyone rallies around jilted Nadia.
"You're beautiful physically, but you have such a kind soul," says Michelle soothingly. "You're going to find someone."
And who should arrive right on cue mid-meal? The last person Nadia wants to find: ANTHONY.
"I'm not hungry anymore," says Nadia.
Anthony makes his way around the table shaking hands and patting everyone on the back. He 'headbutts' Nadia with a cheek kiss much to her despair.
"It's like roadkill," she tells us. "I don't even want to look."
But look she must, for Anthony soon makes Sharon move so that he can sit directly next to Nadia. She is terrified.
Lauren, watching from afar, has adopted Anthony's old line to set the scene: "S--- just got real." And she has no time for him "trying to f---ing save face."
"I just want to say that I'm sorry," says Anthony.
Nadia offers a terse "thanks" but refuses to give him any more satisfaction.
"You're not sorry," she tells us. "That's who you are. That's what you wanted. Don't bulls--- me. Don't mess with me."
I wish she would have said all of this directly TO Anthony, but at least she's not putting up with him anymore.
"He thinks what he did was very admirable, but it was actually very under the table," she continues. "A man that I want to be with doesn't make a woman cry, doesn't make her question who she is as a person.
"I'm sorry, I keep my cool. I'm chill, but SERIOUSLY. No, I don't want to be with him. I was always pushing for his truth, and I got it. I don't want it. I don't want him."
Honourable mention: The Debbie and John OMG, Deb's still got it in for John
Debbie is still offended by everything John does, calls him 'husband', and wonders why he didn't kiss her upon arrival or get her a drink.
And when he finally does offer her something, he's a dead man walking because it's…GLUTEN-FILLED CUPCAKES.
Honourable mention: WTF Sean and Susan
What is going on with Susan and Sean?! They are still not together, but they ARE planning an international vacation with his children.
Oh! And in case you're wondering Simon and Alene are still together and doing GREAT. So are Nick and Sharon.
NEXT TIME: Nadia confronts Anthony to his face! AND the experts finally play back the boys' night tape for all to see!
