'Very poor manners': The once-common social tradition Aussies no longer think is OK
Updated . First published
Gone are the days of simply "popping in" to a friend's house, with the majority of Aussies saying spontaneous at-home catch-ups should be left in the past.
Whether you happen to "just be in the area" or not, an exclusive nine.com.au reader survey found 51 per cent of respondents believe that in 2026, it is no longer acceptable to pop in to see a friend at home without a text or phone call first.
Just 35 per cent of the 1119 respondents felt a surprise visit was still OK, with 14 per cent sitting on the fence, saying it depended on the situation.
Catch-ups with friends are the best - but most Aussies say you have to plan ahead. Getty
"There are friends that you know you can call on anytime [and] others you can't. My own mother-in-law has a meltdown if we don't give her notice. Others are thrilled if I just show up," one of the Aussies surveyed replied.
Most respondents agreed the appropriateness depended on how well you knew the person, but one felt there was another unwritten rule.
"Between say 10am and 4pm should be fine, otherwise text or phone is necessary," they said.
On the "no" side, many said they did not want to intrude on their friends' busy lives.
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Would you give a warm welcome to surprise visitors? Getty
"Friends won't last long if you pop in unannounced – very poor manners," one person said.
"Today's younger generation does not appreciate visitors 'popping in' unannounced. They feel that it is an intrusion of their privacy," another agreed.
There were, of course, those who held on to a golden age where a spontaneous visit was simply what you did.
"I have always just 'popped in' and will continue to do so. If the person I am visiting doesn't like it (which happened to me many years ago) that will be my final visit," another person said.
In 2025, a Mumsnet user's post sparked debate when she asked for advice about her husband's friends regularly turning up to her house without asking first.
One day, the woman simply didn't invite them in and wondered if she was in the wrong.
"My teenage daughter was in her PJs in the living room (she wouldn't be comfortable like that in front of visitors), I'd just got back from food shopping and was trying to put it away," she explained.
"Is it too hard to send a text and say 'is it OK to pop round in half hour?' Daughter could have got dressed, I could have finished putting my shopping away, could have shut the dogs away ... It's really frustrating me!"
Hopefully they've called ahead... Getty
The woman said she'd never dream of turning up somewhere unannounced, even to her own mother's.
"People could be in the shower, in the middle of something, already have guests, not actually want to see me – a multitude of reasons!"
Most put themselves on her side – further proof the age of "popping in" is well and truly behind us.
*The nine.com.au poll, which runs once a fortnight, canvases the views of the nine audience on 9Nation, which is an online community of our readers and Nine viewers.
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