Parents, here's what the morning rush is doing to your stress levels

I blame the hair dryer.

The sound of it cues the mayhem, madness and meltdowns. My astute one-year-old knows there’s absolutely no way I’d be blow drying my hair to take her to the park or the pool. She knows from experience some kind of adult activity is approaching, and she doesn’t approve.

On this particular morning, I end up throwing my hair in a ponytail anyway, cursing the frizzy bits on top. We paint the wall with avocado, because it’s a shame to waste an expensive item on something as boring as toast, and it’s such a vibrant shade of green that stands out well against a white wall. We find three left shoes before a right. We answer an important phone call on the Casio calculator phone.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah,” my toddler says, while holding the calculator up to her ear. I laugh as I realise she’s imitating me. I grab my own phone – I have to get a quick video, the family will love it. And now we’re 10 minutes late.

Finally, we’re out the door. Did I pack her water bottle? Did I brush her teeth? Did I brush my teeth? Yes, I did. Or maybe that was yesterday. It’s not even a work day. At this point, I’m just trying to get to the dentist. I hope I brushed my teeth.

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We decide to do some tests to get an answer to his question. Brisbane mum of four, Fern Warren, is our case study. We arrange for a cardiologist to put heart rate and blood pressure monitors on her for 24 hours.

As a mum of one, I watch in awe as Fern negotiates lunchbox contents with Mr 10-year-old; brushes Mr 7-year-old’s hair; finds Mr 5-year-old’s pants; then breastfeeds her baby daughter. She has this morning business down pat. Bags for the week’s after school activities are packed on a Sunday; lunchboxes are largely prepared the night before; and the boys diligently take responsibility of dishwasher duties.

The next day, we find out what the Incredible Hulk really is capable of.

“I was not expecting it to be quite so high!” our cardiologist exclaims. Fern’s heart rate reached 170 beats per minute at 8:45am – a clear peak within the 24 hour period. Her blood pressure results show a similar sudden rise around drop-off time. Her average heart rate between 8am and 9am is around 140bpm.

“That’s like somebody jogging,” explains our cardiologist. I optimistically ask if this means we’re getting a workout while rushing a household out the door. “There’s room for research there,” she replies wryly.  

The surprising part of the results for Fern is that it wasn’t a particularly stressful morning. There were no cereal spills, no forgotten bags, and certainly no avocado-wiping-on-walls episodes.

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“It’s amazing that we’re doing this every single day, and we don’t realise how much stress our bodies are going through. Every mum and dad is doing this,” she says to me. 

The cardiologist explains it’s particularly important those with heart disease risk factors (family history; high blood pressure; those who smoke or are overweight) take care of themselves. But she also says every parent should find a way to lower their heart rate at some stage of each day.

“What do you do for you?” she asks Fern, while encouraging her to read a book, go for a walk, do yoga, or whatever it is that allows her to de-stress. 

It’s hard to think of a better excuse to pause for a moment – even if it is in the car with a sleeping bub in the back, or in the staff kitchen at work. Close your eyes, put on a feel-good song, or enjoy a scorching hot coffee (ah, the luxury of it!) But just make sure you do it before 2:30pm, because then we move into afternoon pick-up time.

And that’s a whole new story.