Amelia Adams: 'Solo parenting is bloody hard work'

There is a reason it takes two humans to create a child. Because you need two sets of hands to wrangle them.

Hats off to single parents everywhere, because I'm getting a taste of it and it's bloody hard work. It’s lonely, anxiety inducing and all-consuming. It can also be incredibly satisfying. I love the special, quality time I have with my children all to myself, but most days I countdown till bedtime so I finally can be alone with my Aldi chocolate and Netflix. 

To be clear – I am not a single parent, and acknowledge that I can never understand how hard that must be. My husband travels for work, weeks at a time in remote locations. But even in the darkest, loneliness, most s--t-covered moments, I have a partner. He's out of phone range and I’m going to throw dirty nappies at his head when he comes home, but we are a team. A great team actually, and while he's not physically here much right now, we're in this together, and if something goes horribly wrong with one of the kids I can probably reach him on a satellite phone and he will say all the right things and come home as soon as he can. I also have wonderful family and amazing neighbours without whom I could barely do the groceries let alone hold down a job. 

“It’s lonely.”

It is. In the park, I start up conversations with strangers, while at work I ramble and awkwardly overshare, trying desperately to sound like a normal human while consumed by the sheer joy of seeing my friends and being allowed to finish my sentences.

https://omny.fm/shows/9honey-life-bites/mummy-rage/embed?style=artwork

You lose perspective. Things you’d workshop or vent about and laugh off with a partner become niggling obsessions. My 8 month-old won’t sleep during the day, surely her brain won’t develop properly? My 3 year-old has refused breakfast all week, obviously he’s going to die of a Weetbix deficiency. Does he tell them at Kindy he doesn’t get breakfast at home? And what do they think of me, the mum who starves her child and never bothers to put a bra on for drop off??