'My husband's ex-wife told me a secret that ended our friendship'

I married my husband Dan three years ago, and I've always known he had a pretty special bond with his ex-wife Marie.

She has two kids with him and they apparently had an amicable split, so I've never had a problem with her. I like to think I'm a great stepmother to her daughters, and now I have a girl of my own our friendship has grown.

I wouldn't say we were best friends and we don't exactly socialise together, but we have a great deal of mutual respect. My little girl adores her and I honestly love her two girls.

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I'm also very well aware there are plenty of things Marie would know about Dan that I don't know or understand. They had a decade of marriage, so she's been through a lot with him, especially when he went through a cancer battle before I met him.  

But recently Marie has been spending a lot more time at our house, and over a few drinks she told me a secret about Dan that has really rocked my world.

She told me that throughout her marriage to him, he had an on-off relationship with his cousin's ex-wife Jill, and – according to Marie – he still speaks to her every week.

Well, this was news to me. She made me promise not to tell Dan that she had told me anything, but it's a hard promise to keep. Instead, I very carefully started doing a bit of minor investigating.

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I went through our phone records and found a recurring number. I put my phone onto private mode and called the number and the woman answered with "Jill speaking." I hung up right away but my heart was pounding.

Marie said she thought I should know because she's always been a bit jealous of Dan and Jill's relationship. 

How did I not know anything about this before? I was lying awake, feeling stressed and insecure, and decided I'd bring it up with Dan the next day.

"Tell me about your friendship with Jill," I said, and without batting an eyelid he said, "Oh she's just an old friend." He told me what I already knew, that she was his cousin's ex-wife. Then he changed the subject.

The fact that he didn't even ask me why I was asking him was very weird to me. 

I called Marie and she said, "You need to ask more questions. I don't mean to alarm you but I believe they have been together, if you know what I mean." So Marie was suspicious Dan had had an affair with Jill while he was married to Marie.

This is where it got weird, because when I confronted Dan, he saidJill had wanted to take their friendship further but he declined. He said he only ever saw her as a friend and said he'd swear on his mother's life.

So I am no longer friends with Marie. I believe she was trying to cause trouble. I still see her occasionally as I want my daughter to stay close to her half-sisters, but I will never trust Marie again. I'm glad I chose to believe my husband and not his ex-wife.