How Princess Diana helped this UK mum grieve the octuplets she lost

The 'octo-mum' who became world famous after miscarrying octuplets has revealed how she got through the ordeal thanks to secret meetings with Princess Diana.
 
Mandy Allwood, 53, fell pregnant with eight children aged 31 in 1996, and gave birth early at 24 weeks.
 
Tragically after giving birth to six boys and two girls over three days and three nights, each of the babies died in a matter of hours.
 
Mandy, from Stratford-upon-Avon, Warwickshire, spiralled into depression and suffered with suicidal thoughts in the years after her babies died in her arms.
 
But with the 22nd anniversary of her children's deaths just days away, she has revealed what got her through her darkest days: secret meetings with Princess Diana.
 
September 30 will mark 22 years, and Mandy says hugs of support and laughs at glitzy London hotels with the princess helped keep her from suicidal thoughts.
 
The unlikely brief friendship formed at a time when Mandy was receiving hoards of hate mail over her decision not to abort the pregnancy.

Mandy recalls how she met with Princess Diana five weeks after her miscarriages, and the People's Princess jokingly thanked her for "keeping me off the front pages".
 
She says the Princess met with her twice for an hour a time, and that the pair enjoyed crab and prawn lunches together in top London hotels.

Caught up in somewhat of a media storm, at the time Mandy was spending most of her time staying in hotels in the capital as she told her story to the world.
 
Mandy said: "She came to meet me when I was staying at the Ritz and the Dorchester in London. She was absolutely lovely.
 
"I never really got the chance to say thank you to her properly. She gave me a hug, showed me lots of support and told me she liked my dress.
 
"When we first met she said to me 'thank you for keeping me off the front pages for a change'. It was a massive boost for me."

It was Princess Diana who made the first move to set up the meetings, who Mandy says wanted to offer her support following the trauma.
 
The Princess sent Mandy two lunch invitations by post, and the pair met once in October 1996 and once a month later.
 
Recalling a "fabulous" personal bond with the Princess, Mandy says they even had nicknames for each other, with Mandy calling Diana 'D' and Diana calling Mandy 'MJ', for Mandy Jane.

According to Mandy, Princess Diana shared her own stories of struggling with anxiety and depression, and also spoke about family life with Prince Charles.

"They are always in my mind and I think about them every single day," she said.
 
"I still have panic attacks now when I think about it but I've learnt to overcome them. I've found a way of managing that works for me.
 
"I did want to kill myself. It was a horrible time for me. I was thrown into the media and I didn't know what to do.
 
"But I've turned those thoughts into positive energy. I told myself to stop this nonsense and get on with it."
 
Now feeling "happier" than she has in years, Mandy added how she has "come a long way" since her lowest ebb, when she was stuck in a depressive rut.
 
She now runs her own business in Stratford-upon-Avon, and has taken to art and canvas drawing as a way of dealing with any returning negative thoughts.

In the years after the traumatic ordeal, Mandy suffered from a condition which makes her feel phantom movements from the pregnancy. She recalled being able to "feel her babies kicking inside her every day".
 
"That has gone now, I don't feel it any more," said Mandy.

"Those letters stopped me from killing myself," she said.
 
"I had letters saying 'we love you'. They were lovely and really kept me going. They are what got me through it all."
 
Alongside chronic depression Mandy fought a battle against suicide attempts and struggled with alcohol addiction. In 2009 she took the step to seek professional help, at a residential rehab centre in Weston-super-Mare, Somerset, for five months.
 
Having seemingly come through an agonisingly painful period of her life, Mandy says she is living proof that "there is hope" for women who have gone through similar traumas.
 
She has urged women - who may be going through or have gone through a miscarriage - to stay strong and tell yourself that "you love yourself".
 
She said: "You will never ever forget your babies, but don't be hard on yourself. Give yourself time and space and look in the mirror and say that you love yourself.
 
"You will never forget your little boy or girl but you can't change it, but you will always have those memories and you will come through it. Stay positive and it will work out."