'I never thought I would be the nagging wife': Woman's raw open letter to her husband

I miss us. Remember when it was just you and me, before the endless bills, long work hours and the kids?

It's hard for me sometimes to look at you and not cry. I never thought we would be 'that' couple. I never thought I would be 'that' woman. Some days it's like we are just room mates who occasionally have sex.

We barely talk and when we do it's about overdue electricity bills, or it's me nagging you do to something, or us talking about the children.

It's funny, but I still get excited when you walk through the door even if you're not smiling.

I ask you the same questions when you get in: "How was work? What did you do?" You just shrug your shoulders.

Is this actually us? The thing I thought we would never become.

Some days I feel like I tricked you into marrying me. Eight years ago you got this beautiful, vibrant, skinny and fun girl and now you get frumpy, fat, grumpy, sad and miserable Jess.

We have so many kids we don't get date nights anymore - the last time we went on a date was 2017. These days our date nights are two hours together watching a repeat of a movie we've already seen. We both watch it while on our phones and then we sneak in some very rushed sex with our clothes on because I never want you to see me naked.

I love you, but I love who we use to be. You don't get the best of me anymore and I'm sorry - you deserve more than that.

I never thought I would be the nagging wife, the wife who wears the same clothes three days in a row, the one without any makeup on or dress sense, the one that yells more than talks. Maybe it's me; maybe I've changed so much I changed us.

I worry some days that you stick around just for our children. I don't even know how you can love someone so grouchy and uptight. All I know is that I really love you and I always will. I also love our kids.

But we really need to find each other again, find our passion, the thing that brought us to each other. It was the reason why we decided to create four beautiful little people together.

I hope in 30 years time we can sit back together and reminisce about the harder times, the endless debt and long hours trying to settle the children. I hope we can stick together and see this out, even through the hard times.

I know what we are capable of and I know we can move mountains together. I love you and no relationship is perfect, set's keep trying. Because I'll never give up on you, and I'll definitely never give up on us.