Violent men, not just victims, need help

Men who want to stop being violent in the family home are being put on waiting lists to get help but that often doesn't come until it's too late, a leading social service says.

Programs aimed at changing men's behaviour in Victoria are undervalued and underfunded, with waiting lists of up to 500 people, Anglicare Victoria says in its submission to the Royal Commission into Family Violence.

The inquiry is holding a limited number of public hearings in October after several weeks of evidence being heard between July and August.

Anglicare provides three men's behavioural programs in Melbourne and has seen first-hand the importance of not letting a man's personal motivation to address their behaviour go to waste.

"The motivation held by men to change their violent behaviours can be fleeting," the organisation says.

"If enough time passes before men can be engaged into an effective intervention response, this can result in a return to ... outright dangerous beliefs and attitudes which men use to justify their abusive behaviours."

And while some men may express genuine remorse over violent acts, this does not necessarily mean they have addressed the causes of their behaviour.

"Men may find themselves in a 'honeymoon stage' of the cycle of family violence," Anglicare says.

"As such, women and children remain at risk as it is likely to be only a matter of time before tensions and conflict begin to build again in the lead-up to yet another violent incident."

Anglicare wants the state government to review men's behaviour programs and increase their reach so men get help as soon as possible instead of being put on waiting lists.

The royal commission will resume public hearings on October 12.