'My heart was in my mouth': How a dad's emergency detour gave his son a second chance

I’m shedding a tear as I write this – I challenge anyone reading it not to.

This is the story of Dylan, a 21-year-old who in four days on the Black Dog Ride Around Australia, has found a reason to live.

“Obviously a lot of tears on the back of the bike … it’s just been really good to be out on the open road with people who are supporting me,” he told me.

Dylan and his family live in Townsville.

His father, Jamie Painter, rode from Townsville to start the BDRAA at Bateau Bay nine days ago.

When we arrived back in Townsville four days later, the Painter family’s life was thrown into chaos.

A series of desperate texts sounded an alarm.

“I arrived at his house, the front door was unlocked, slightly ajar. I call out and heard nothing … my heart was in my mouth.” Jamie recalls.

“As I was stepping into the house I thought ‘what am I walking in to’ … then I heard a sniffle.

“Dylan just walked out, draped himself over me and he was crying”.

You see, that day Dylan climbed on a chair, put a noose around his neck, tied it to a tree branch and was seconds away from kicking the chair away.

Dylan’s girlfriend had arrived at the house moments earlier, ringing him as she walked up the driveway.

Instead of kicking the chair away, Dylan, picked up his mobile - that probably saved his life.

“When she arrived he took the rope from around his neck and stepped down … if she had not turned up when she did I may well have walked in to finding him swinging.“ Jamie said.

Dylan and his dad both suffer depression.

The Black Dog Ride – as Jamie puts it – wrapped the family in a blanket of care.

“It’s wrapped that blanket around me, Dylan and my family and it’s something that is very rare.

“Dylan’s part of the black dog family now - even though he doesn’t even have a license to ride a bike … to share these experiences with my son … it’s immeasurable.”

For the past four days Dylan has ridden pillion on his father’s Harley-Davidson.

It’s given the father and son the chance to talk through what pushed Dylan to the brink.

“It’s been amazing to be out there on the road, to be able to clear my head … to know that I am not alone,” Dylan told me.

“In between Townsville and here I’ve gone from having a broken heart to having a heart that’s over full … because I have seen the change in him, “ his dad adds.

For several days before he tried to kill himself, Dylan was alone in his house in the depths of depression. e’d hit rock bottom.

“I sat in the dark and cried to myself for days on end.”

His father says he’s now a changed young man.

“As a sufferer of depression myself, I regard myself as a survivor, not that I am through it completely but that I have made the decision to beat it.

“Dylan’s also made the decision ... this disease is not a life sentence for him … he is going to beat it.”

Today we farewelled Dylan as he climbed on the back of his Dad’s Harley and headed to Darwin to fly home to Townsville.

“I came on this ride not knowing what to expect. Everyone, without question, has just opened their arms. They have just taken me in as if I was part of the group from the start,” Dylan said as he put on his helmet.

“The last four days is probably the first time I have been able to open up clearly about everything, about my whole life, with my father.”

Dylan now knows he is not facing his demons alone. He now knows he has an extended family. He now knows we’re all there for him.

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